I have a thing for soundfonts—they’re lightweight RAM-wise, incredibly flexible, and best of all, they can work in pretty much any DAW thanks to the prevalence of VST soundfont players. I recommend Cakewalk’s SFZ Player, which I personally use almost always. It doesn’t allow for too much manipulation, but it’s incredibly lightweight. Besides, fancy effects are what plugins are for.
Anyway, I’ve taken to making soundfonts for myself, but there’s really no harm in sharing. First, I should probably mention that I make the soundfonts so that one file equals one instrument rather than having multiple instruments condensed into a single soundfont. The reason for this is that larger soundfonts require more RAM (as I discovered when I made a soundfont with something like 130 instruments that all had tons of samples), so keeping each instrument in a separate file keeps everything nice and fast and convenient.
Just click the above link. If that doesn’t work for whatever reason, try right-clicking and hitting “save link as,” or something like that. Different browsers say different things because they’re made by jerks, but I trust you to figure it out.
Why call it Fuzzychord?
Duh, I call it Fuzzychord for obvious reasons. Just listen to the sample above that was made using nothing but one instance of Fuzzychord. Save for a little bit of compression, there aren’t any effects applied at all. With some proper EQing and spatial effects, it could be a truly epic instrument.
What you can do with it
I suppose this would normally be called “license” or something, but I’m horrible with official-sounding stuff. Okay, here are the rules:
I HEREBY GRANT YOU THE RIGHT TO USE FUZZYCHORD FOR THE PURPOSES OF MUSIC, PICKING UP ATTRACTIVE WOMEN IN BARS, AND PRETTY MUCH ANY OTHER REASONABLE USE A REASONABLE PERSON COULD THINK OF. IF YOU’RE A SCHEMING, CONNING DOUCHEBAG, HOWEVER, YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO USE IT BECAUSE I SAID SO. THAT BASICALLY MEANS NO CHARGING FOR IT, THOUGH IF YOU WANT TO PRETEND THAT YOU CREATED IT TO IMPRESS THE AFOREMENTIONED ATTRACTIVE BAR WOMEN, KNOCK YOURSELF OUT. ALSO, IF YOU WANT TO SPREAD FUZZYCHORD AROUND TO SHARE THE CACOPHONOUS LOVE, IT’D BE NICE IF YOU LINKED YOUR BUDDIES TO THIS PAGE. I SUPPOSE YOU COULD JUST COPY THE FILE AND GIVE IT TO A FRIEND, BUT LINKS ARE ALWAYS APPRECIATED.