Chaos Rings Review

It’s been a long, long, long time since Square-Enix was involved in a jRPG that I didn’t hate. In fact, since Squaresoft and Enix merged in 2003, neither of the strengths of either have shown through like they used to; Squaresoft was responsible for Final Fantasy games so great that the series remains milk-able to this day, while Enix was responsible for the amazing Actraiser and a handful of other decent games (Illusion of Gaia and many of their other games weren’t exactly masterpieces). What are they reduced to now, though? Re-releasing Final Fantasy 7 with DRM? Remaking my beloved Lufia 2 and changing a bunch of things? No—for this hideous, ball-less Frankenstein of a company that managed to mix Square’s peanut butter and Enix’s chocolate and come up with manure instead of a peanut butter cup, I’ll show no mercy. Unfortunately for my burning thirst for vengeance, Chaos Rings is actually surprisingly good. Especially for an iOS game. Read more →

Bastion Review

Bastion isn’t the kind of game I’d normally go for, mostly because it sports that kind of hack-and-slash (or shoot or whatever) combat that I can’t stand. That and the fact that I heard that it’s not fun using a keyboard and mouse, which are my tools of choice. Still, I pressed on and bought it, determined to… uh, determine… what everyone saw in it. Read more →

Chrono Trigger Review

This is the game with the story and the art style and the music. Read more →

Infinity Blade Review

Older games had a fairly straightforward approach to progression: You fought monsters until your level and abilities went up a bit, then you progressed with the story. Infinity Blade has done away with that silly story aspect and given us nothing but the grind. No reward, no actual story, just fighting random monsters so that you’re strong enough to fight other random monsters. Seriously, all this game consists of is endless grinding. I bought this back when it was full price because thousands of people were giving it five stars out of five, and I was under the impression that such a large group of people couldn’t possibly be wrong. Turns out that thousands of people have absolutely no taste. Read more →

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